Loving Deeply

The central focus of Christianity is love. The nature of God is love. Love is the distinguishing mark of a follower of Jesus. The great commandment is to love God, all others (including enemies), ourselves, and the natural world God created. Without love we are clanging cymbals. 

In his book How to be an Adult in Relationships – The Five Keys to Mindful Loving,[1]David Richo exhorts us to come topeople with unconditional presence characterized by:

  1. Attention: Bring sensitivity to the needs of others; listen deeply. When feelings are listened to respectfully, understood, and empathized with, trust and safety result.
  2. Acceptance: Receive people respectfully; nonjudgmentally accept them for who they are. Offer approval; love unconditionally; let people know you are always there for them and will never give up on them.
  3. Appreciation: Express admiration of and gratitude for others, communicate delight in others, acknowledge their potential
  4. Affection: Give appropriate touch, kindliness, considerateness, thoughtfulness, playfulness, romance, nearness, presence, compassion, empathy
  5. Allowing: Offer to others the freedom and flexibility to grow and develop without controlling or manipulating

Come to people, not at  them.

Do not come atpeople with:

  1. Fear, worry, defensiveness
  2. Desire, trying to get something out of the other person
  3. Judgment, being caught up in my own opinion about another
  4. Control, the need to fix, advise, change
  5. Illusion, denial, projection, fantasy, idealization, depreciation, wishes that obscure reality

[1]Richo, David, How to be an Adult in Relationships – The Five Keys to Mindful Loving, Shambhala, Boulder, 2002

About Dr. Larry Taylor

Radical Anabaptist, Jesus Freak, Red Letter Christian, sailor, thinker, spiritual director, life coach, pastor, teacher, chaplain, counselor, writer, husband, father, grandfather, dog-sitter

Posted on August 30, 2020, in anabaptist, Bible Teaching, Christianity, creation, Jesus, Justice, Kingdom Life, kingdom of God, Peace Shalom Hesed, Spirituality. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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